Sri
I was very young then. It was my birth day. Both my mom and dad went to Necklace road in Hyderabad. Dad had some work and left. So it was me and my mom at around 9 pm happily chatting away with cool breeze. Then some guy comes and asked," How much?", to my mom. My mom shouted at him and grabbed me to her saying that I was her son and my dad will come there soon. I was so scared then. Now I feel guilty for not doing any thing.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Sabah Ahsan Malik
A girl was ogled and hooted at by boys almost every day at a tuition centre to which I used to go in O levels. Surprisingly other females present there laughed at her. What I found outrageous was the indifference of the females towards her. I didn't do much but I made sure I passed a disapproving look at the male perpetrators. It worked. They stopped passing vulgar comments a loud. I asked the other females to not laugh at her but to show her support.
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment or 'eve teasing' and been supported by the public? Did they help? or show support? if yes, in what way?
I was walking with a friend to the French Center which is at a distance from the University where we study. I was walking behind my friend. Two boys riding a motor bike hooted loudly, whistled and then said something which was inaudible to me in all the traffic din. The motor bike rushed past me. I stopped. I was out of breath because of the sheer closeness of the vehicle that went by me and was relieved I did not get hit. I was not supported by the public. My friend assured me to not to feel scared and keep walking.
How would you like public to show support?
When I experience street sexual harassment I would like someone from the public to offer company and comforting words. To remind me that the fault is of the perpetrator. If the perpetrator is told of what he just did and how wrong it was, that would be great!
A girl was ogled and hooted at by boys almost every day at a tuition centre to which I used to go in O levels. Surprisingly other females present there laughed at her. What I found outrageous was the indifference of the females towards her. I didn't do much but I made sure I passed a disapproving look at the male perpetrators. It worked. They stopped passing vulgar comments a loud. I asked the other females to not laugh at her but to show her support.
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment or 'eve teasing' and been supported by the public? Did they help? or show support? if yes, in what way?
I was walking with a friend to the French Center which is at a distance from the University where we study. I was walking behind my friend. Two boys riding a motor bike hooted loudly, whistled and then said something which was inaudible to me in all the traffic din. The motor bike rushed past me. I stopped. I was out of breath because of the sheer closeness of the vehicle that went by me and was relieved I did not get hit. I was not supported by the public. My friend assured me to not to feel scared and keep walking.
How would you like public to show support?
When I experience street sexual harassment I would like someone from the public to offer company and comforting words. To remind me that the fault is of the perpetrator. If the perpetrator is told of what he just did and how wrong it was, that would be great!
Friday, August 29, 2008
Myna
I had just hopped onto a bus and ofcourse it was crowded. I tried to reach out for the women's section hoping to find a woman's seat...something I am not a fan of but I realize it's value- in terms of encouraging women to access public transport. I suppose it is regressive- but never the less, I depend on it.
The entire women's section was taken over by men who didnt offer the seat even though they saw a mass of women waiting to sit.
I was tired. It had been a long day..wasnt sure how to get a seat without causing trouble or making a scene. I asked the women around me why men filled up the women's seats. Some smiled and looked away. Some said 'they wont listen, they are like this only'. Eventually after many attempts at getting the local women in the bus to get 'our' seat and failing I went up to a man and asked for the seat. He refused. I stood there , looking at him until he got up. I dont quite fit in , culturally , visually - people see me as alien. I have been asked if Im kashmiri. french or even iranian despite my poor steady attempts at speaking the local language.
Back to the man and the seat and us women:
I continued to look at him and repeatedly ask for the seat. Other women looked on. Ofcourse I was making a scene for 'no apparent reason' as some might interpret...but he finally got up.
I would be considered more of an outsider if I grabbed the seat he vacated, and so instead I asked the local women of the region to sit there. Seeing the scene another man left the women's seat and I finally got my place. It was a strategic move...and as a result I ended up making polite peaceful conversations on my way back home.
I had just hopped onto a bus and ofcourse it was crowded. I tried to reach out for the women's section hoping to find a woman's seat...something I am not a fan of but I realize it's value- in terms of encouraging women to access public transport. I suppose it is regressive- but never the less, I depend on it.
The entire women's section was taken over by men who didnt offer the seat even though they saw a mass of women waiting to sit.
I was tired. It had been a long day..wasnt sure how to get a seat without causing trouble or making a scene. I asked the women around me why men filled up the women's seats. Some smiled and looked away. Some said 'they wont listen, they are like this only'. Eventually after many attempts at getting the local women in the bus to get 'our' seat and failing I went up to a man and asked for the seat. He refused. I stood there , looking at him until he got up. I dont quite fit in , culturally , visually - people see me as alien. I have been asked if Im kashmiri. french or even iranian despite my poor steady attempts at speaking the local language.
Back to the man and the seat and us women:
I continued to look at him and repeatedly ask for the seat. Other women looked on. Ofcourse I was making a scene for 'no apparent reason' as some might interpret...but he finally got up.
I would be considered more of an outsider if I grabbed the seat he vacated, and so instead I asked the local women of the region to sit there. Seeing the scene another man left the women's seat and I finally got my place. It was a strategic move...and as a result I ended up making polite peaceful conversations on my way back home.
Blank Noise Spectators Special
Suparna Kudesia
Was sitting in an auto when the driver suddenly braked behind these two girls walking in a side alley. The girls were obviously startled and taken aback and the driver thoroughly amused by what he had done. He chuckled and stared at them as he rode away. After a few seconds of processing what had happened, I asked him to stop the auto and pull-over. When he did, I asked him why he did what he did. He was clearly suprised and not pleasantly at all when he responded, "Now what did I do?" I repeated my question asking him not what but why he did what he did. When he mumbled and bumbled for a bit I essentially decided it was pointless to beat about the bramble and tell him exactly what he did and what I thought of it. I wasn't yelling and was surprisingly composed. I was however, angry. He then responded with exasperation and asked what it would take for me to shut up. I was too mad to even respond to him, so I threw the fare at him and walked out saying my last few angry words.
How would you like the public to react?
I would like the public to first help create a space where one doesn't have to feel vulnerable and unsafe. I would then like people to understand that it is completely unacceptable to be violated sexually, physically, and emotionally. If they ever hear someone muster the courage to confront a perpetrator, they must verbally and physically communicate that they believe said survivor. Then there must be a sense of individual responsibility to confront the perpetrator even if you are not the one being harassed.
Was sitting in an auto when the driver suddenly braked behind these two girls walking in a side alley. The girls were obviously startled and taken aback and the driver thoroughly amused by what he had done. He chuckled and stared at them as he rode away. After a few seconds of processing what had happened, I asked him to stop the auto and pull-over. When he did, I asked him why he did what he did. He was clearly suprised and not pleasantly at all when he responded, "Now what did I do?" I repeated my question asking him not what but why he did what he did. When he mumbled and bumbled for a bit I essentially decided it was pointless to beat about the bramble and tell him exactly what he did and what I thought of it. I wasn't yelling and was surprisingly composed. I was however, angry. He then responded with exasperation and asked what it would take for me to shut up. I was too mad to even respond to him, so I threw the fare at him and walked out saying my last few angry words.
How would you like the public to react?
I would like the public to first help create a space where one doesn't have to feel vulnerable and unsafe. I would then like people to understand that it is completely unacceptable to be violated sexually, physically, and emotionally. If they ever hear someone muster the courage to confront a perpetrator, they must verbally and physically communicate that they believe said survivor. Then there must be a sense of individual responsibility to confront the perpetrator even if you are not the one being harassed.
Nalini
I called the police.
My group of friends and I have always felt that we were the very few lot of our generation who were feminists, but not in a cliched way. We believed that we had to do what we could since there were lots who were unable to speak about harassment that they underwent and in a way owed it to us and them. We were those fortunate ones who had support of family , friends and were brave enough to go to a police station to give a complaint.
I am talking about Bangalore, a good 15-20 years back.
I called the police.
My group of friends and I have always felt that we were the very few lot of our generation who were feminists, but not in a cliched way. We believed that we had to do what we could since there were lots who were unable to speak about harassment that they underwent and in a way owed it to us and them. We were those fortunate ones who had support of family , friends and were brave enough to go to a police station to give a complaint.
I am talking about Bangalore, a good 15-20 years back.
Kavitha Rajaram Mookerjee
This incident occurred on one of the Delhi's infamous DTC buses that I travelled regularly on to my campus everyday about a couple of years back..I saw a girl getting into the bus and a guy following her into the bus.He tried to touch her,brush against her in every manner possible..but somehow couldn't.After witnessing his 'discomfort' I decided to intervene and offered the girl the seat next to me..obviously, the guy was peeved and kept giving us angry glances..but couldn;t do much!!
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment or 'eve teasing' and been supported by the public? Did they help? or show support? if yes, in what way?
Sexual harrasment was an everyday affair as student regularly travelling via 'DTC buses'..one fine day while returning home from the campus I got into one of these extremely crowded buses..call it my folly..never repeated that again!!I got up to get down at my stop and I felt someone groping me and rubbing against me in the crowd..somehow the whole resentment and pent up anger at being subjected to such humiliation somehow got a vent!!I caught the person's hand through the crowd and refused to doggedly let go of it..no matter what!!I HAD to bring out the face from the crowd..LO BEHOLD!!It turned out to be a 50-55 year old man..who instatnly refrred to me as his 'beti'!!That day was a breakthrough...I dragged the guy out of the bus and slapped him repeatedly till he somehow ran off!!No one from the crowd of spectators came to help or support in any form!!I think it was something akin to rage, but after that day ..I fought..I haven't ever been supported on the street EVER as of now..but its my personal battle and if we don't fight for our dignity, I have realised that noone else will!!
How would you like public to support?
Help, verbal support at least!!
This incident occurred on one of the Delhi's infamous DTC buses that I travelled regularly on to my campus everyday about a couple of years back..I saw a girl getting into the bus and a guy following her into the bus.He tried to touch her,brush against her in every manner possible..but somehow couldn't.After witnessing his 'discomfort' I decided to intervene and offered the girl the seat next to me..obviously, the guy was peeved and kept giving us angry glances..but couldn;t do much!!
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment or 'eve teasing' and been supported by the public? Did they help? or show support? if yes, in what way?
Sexual harrasment was an everyday affair as student regularly travelling via 'DTC buses'..one fine day while returning home from the campus I got into one of these extremely crowded buses..call it my folly..never repeated that again!!I got up to get down at my stop and I felt someone groping me and rubbing against me in the crowd..somehow the whole resentment and pent up anger at being subjected to such humiliation somehow got a vent!!I caught the person's hand through the crowd and refused to doggedly let go of it..no matter what!!I HAD to bring out the face from the crowd..LO BEHOLD!!It turned out to be a 50-55 year old man..who instatnly refrred to me as his 'beti'!!That day was a breakthrough...I dragged the guy out of the bus and slapped him repeatedly till he somehow ran off!!No one from the crowd of spectators came to help or support in any form!!I think it was something akin to rage, but after that day ..I fought..I haven't ever been supported on the street EVER as of now..but its my personal battle and if we don't fight for our dignity, I have realised that noone else will!!
How would you like public to support?
Help, verbal support at least!!
Jayashree
I don't think I've ever really seen anyone being sexually harrassed. I don't include things like cat-calls, staring and so on in this definition since it's too [frighteningly] common on the streets. To the point where I haven't done anything about it at all.
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment or 'eve teasing' and been supported by the public? Did they help? or show support? if yes, in what way?
I have experienced harrassment but nobody ever really came forward to do anything about it. People just sort of walked past as if nothing had even happened in the same vicinity as them.
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment and made a scene and not have the public support you?
Yes. A man on the street was walking towards me and he reached out and touched me. I called out violently and tried to swing at him, while gesturing to the people around me, expecting some sort of reaction. However, people chose to walk past me anyway. It was sad but not shocking or unexpected {their reaction).
How would you like the public to react?
An outcry. Like in the movies, people gathering around, being responsive and reactive. No matter how 'trivial' the incident, I would like some sort of anger or outlash against the perpetrator, just so that he knows that it ISN'T trivial.
But I don't see this happening very quickly.I myself don't have that mindset. Or at least I don't know yet whether I do.
I don't think I've ever really seen anyone being sexually harrassed. I don't include things like cat-calls, staring and so on in this definition since it's too [frighteningly] common on the streets. To the point where I haven't done anything about it at all.
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment or 'eve teasing' and been supported by the public? Did they help? or show support? if yes, in what way?
I have experienced harrassment but nobody ever really came forward to do anything about it. People just sort of walked past as if nothing had even happened in the same vicinity as them.
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment and made a scene and not have the public support you?
Yes. A man on the street was walking towards me and he reached out and touched me. I called out violently and tried to swing at him, while gesturing to the people around me, expecting some sort of reaction. However, people chose to walk past me anyway. It was sad but not shocking or unexpected {their reaction).
How would you like the public to react?
An outcry. Like in the movies, people gathering around, being responsive and reactive. No matter how 'trivial' the incident, I would like some sort of anger or outlash against the perpetrator, just so that he knows that it ISN'T trivial.
But I don't see this happening very quickly.I myself don't have that mindset. Or at least I don't know yet whether I do.
Amit Kendurkar
Chair car of Shatabdi Express, I had a Window seat while a girl in my row had a Isle seat. Another passenger kept coming to our row to speak to his acquaintance every few minutes. While he was talking to his acquaintance he was almost leaning on the girls seat, occasionally brushing against her while he spoke in an animated way. I could see the discomfort on the girls face, though she never uttered a word.
I thought about intervening, but was not sure of the reaction I would get from the girl! After watching this happening for a while, I requested the girl if she would be willing to swap seats with me. She immediately accepted the offer, and this guy did not show up again once he found me sitting in the isle seat.
Chair car of Shatabdi Express, I had a Window seat while a girl in my row had a Isle seat. Another passenger kept coming to our row to speak to his acquaintance every few minutes. While he was talking to his acquaintance he was almost leaning on the girls seat, occasionally brushing against her while he spoke in an animated way. I could see the discomfort on the girls face, though she never uttered a word.
I thought about intervening, but was not sure of the reaction I would get from the girl! After watching this happening for a while, I requested the girl if she would be willing to swap seats with me. She immediately accepted the offer, and this guy did not show up again once he found me sitting in the isle seat.
Neeru Malhotra
Once in a bus, a very old man, around 60 was sitting besides me and he kept on pushing his elbow into me, so by the end of 10minutes I was almost off the seat.. sitting just on the edge. Generally in situations like this I do respond but in this case I was concerned that I don't know how people will respond if I accuse such an old man. These two women sitting on the back seat (they were around 45 year old and looked like village women)told the man "ladki kuch bol nahi rahi to tu kuch bhi karta rahega" (the girl is not saying anything that does not mean you keep doing anything you want). I was embarrassed and did not have the courage to thank both the women as I felt that I should have spokn out in the first place.
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment and made a scene and not have the public support you?
Yes, there have been times when I have been sexually harassed in a bus, and a bus generally has around 60-70 people but nobody ever responded. I feel really frustrated at such times, and one time I even rebuked the whole bus shouting at the top of my voice on all the people in the bus for not responding.
How would you like the public to show support when you experience street sexual harassment?
I do not expect the public to come up in huge numbers and fight off the guilty, but atleast coming up and asking that what the issue is. Nobody in today's world is expected to get into somebody else's mess but they should also realize that even a little support from atleast one person gives more strength.
Once in a bus, a very old man, around 60 was sitting besides me and he kept on pushing his elbow into me, so by the end of 10minutes I was almost off the seat.. sitting just on the edge. Generally in situations like this I do respond but in this case I was concerned that I don't know how people will respond if I accuse such an old man. These two women sitting on the back seat (they were around 45 year old and looked like village women)told the man "ladki kuch bol nahi rahi to tu kuch bhi karta rahega" (the girl is not saying anything that does not mean you keep doing anything you want). I was embarrassed and did not have the courage to thank both the women as I felt that I should have spokn out in the first place.
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment and made a scene and not have the public support you?
Yes, there have been times when I have been sexually harassed in a bus, and a bus generally has around 60-70 people but nobody ever responded. I feel really frustrated at such times, and one time I even rebuked the whole bus shouting at the top of my voice on all the people in the bus for not responding.
How would you like the public to show support when you experience street sexual harassment?
I do not expect the public to come up in huge numbers and fight off the guilty, but atleast coming up and asking that what the issue is. Nobody in today's world is expected to get into somebody else's mess but they should also realize that even a little support from atleast one person gives more strength.
Hashim Badani
Three motorbikes whizzed passed a lady as one of them try to feel her up. They were six of them and dissapeared before there was a chance to react. None the less being a bystander and not doing anything about it makes you feel guilty and a bit sick.
How would you like the public to react?
Be supportive and bring the guilty to books even if it meant a bi of a trashing. Anything to stand up for acts ike these not going unnoticed.
Three motorbikes whizzed passed a lady as one of them try to feel her up. They were six of them and dissapeared before there was a chance to react. None the less being a bystander and not doing anything about it makes you feel guilty and a bit sick.
How would you like the public to react?
Be supportive and bring the guilty to books even if it meant a bi of a trashing. Anything to stand up for acts ike these not going unnoticed.
Reva Prakash
My earlier experinces where I was too scared to do anything made me realize that if somebody was with me it would give me more courage to speak out.
I was not only a spectator here but a survivor too. While on our evening walk in a park outside our PG in National Park we heard a man some yards away addressing us from across the fence of the park. At first I was unable to understand what he was saying, I realized that my friend was really scared. I asked what the man was saying. Too scared to react, she just asked me to keep walking. I stopped to hear what he was saying.I felt harasses, offended and also enraged. I shouted back standing in the middle of the park at the man and was amazed to see that he turned back and started to run.Iran back and hurled choicest abuses. My friend in the meanwhile just stood dumbstruck. Other walkers just turned to look at what t was happening and kept walking.Some gave me a sharp look for I looked like a crazy women who was shouting at a total stranger.Not one person stopped to ask what had just happened.
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment or 'eve teasing' and been supported by the public? Did they help? or show support? if yes, in what way?
No, except when I was with my friends who supported me.My friends went back with me to locate the guy who had asked me to help him masturbate in broad day light on a deserted road. Shocked, I had told him to go to hell and shut up.
My earlier experinces where I was too scared to do anything made me realize that if somebody was with me it would give me more courage to speak out.
I was not only a spectator here but a survivor too. While on our evening walk in a park outside our PG in National Park we heard a man some yards away addressing us from across the fence of the park. At first I was unable to understand what he was saying, I realized that my friend was really scared. I asked what the man was saying. Too scared to react, she just asked me to keep walking. I stopped to hear what he was saying.I felt harasses, offended and also enraged. I shouted back standing in the middle of the park at the man and was amazed to see that he turned back and started to run.Iran back and hurled choicest abuses. My friend in the meanwhile just stood dumbstruck. Other walkers just turned to look at what t was happening and kept walking.Some gave me a sharp look for I looked like a crazy women who was shouting at a total stranger.Not one person stopped to ask what had just happened.
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment or 'eve teasing' and been supported by the public? Did they help? or show support? if yes, in what way?
No, except when I was with my friends who supported me.My friends went back with me to locate the guy who had asked me to help him masturbate in broad day light on a deserted road. Shocked, I had told him to go to hell and shut up.
Sneha Banerjee
It once happened in a DTC bus, when a girl asked a man to vacate the ladies seat, though the man did so he stood right beside her and kept poking her armpit with his penis... it was really discreet and could easily pass as jerk in the bus... I was in the seat right behind the girl... the girl asked him to go and stand elsewhere to which he said "have you bought this bus?...you want me to get up from the seat and also should I stand anywhere with your permission?" I intervened and supported the girl and created a big hue and cry... got into a verbal duel... finally the man had to move away from there and he got down soon after.
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment or 'eve teasing' and been supported by the public? Did they help? or show support? if yes, in what way?
Numerous instances....it has unfortunately become "normal" on Delhi streets... however I continue to answer back to lewd comments or stare back at lewd stares, etc etc...mostly people do not come forward to help... whenever I have recieved support it has been from women either my mother's age or my own..
How would you like the public to support you?
Support in humiliating the perpetrator and reprimand him in a suitable way.
It once happened in a DTC bus, when a girl asked a man to vacate the ladies seat, though the man did so he stood right beside her and kept poking her armpit with his penis... it was really discreet and could easily pass as jerk in the bus... I was in the seat right behind the girl... the girl asked him to go and stand elsewhere to which he said "have you bought this bus?...you want me to get up from the seat and also should I stand anywhere with your permission?" I intervened and supported the girl and created a big hue and cry... got into a verbal duel... finally the man had to move away from there and he got down soon after.
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment or 'eve teasing' and been supported by the public? Did they help? or show support? if yes, in what way?
Numerous instances....it has unfortunately become "normal" on Delhi streets... however I continue to answer back to lewd comments or stare back at lewd stares, etc etc...mostly people do not come forward to help... whenever I have recieved support it has been from women either my mother's age or my own..
How would you like the public to support you?
Support in humiliating the perpetrator and reprimand him in a suitable way.
Ashish
I was traveling with my wife on a local bus. it was crowded and there were women hanging on the hand bar on the ceiling of the bus. one man next to us was sporting a fancy cell phone. i noticed that he was clicking pictures of a girl next to him, who, due to rush, was unable to cover her modesty.
we discussed in hush-hush at first. then we confronted the man. we also pointed out the scene to the girl/woman involved. she was not interested in pursuing the man. we however were loud and demanded him to remove photos from the phone. at first he was very aggressive, but soon claimed to have removed all photos. he got nervous and got down from the bus.
I was traveling with my wife on a local bus. it was crowded and there were women hanging on the hand bar on the ceiling of the bus. one man next to us was sporting a fancy cell phone. i noticed that he was clicking pictures of a girl next to him, who, due to rush, was unable to cover her modesty.
we discussed in hush-hush at first. then we confronted the man. we also pointed out the scene to the girl/woman involved. she was not interested in pursuing the man. we however were loud and demanded him to remove photos from the phone. at first he was very aggressive, but soon claimed to have removed all photos. he got nervous and got down from the bus.
Sue
Have you ever seen a complete stranger experience street sexual harassment?
She handled it before I could help out and didn't seem to want help. Got down from the bus soon afterwards, I think.
What made you react in the way that you did? ( Please give an account of what occurred.)
I watched and waited to see if she would speak out. Because there is no point trying to make trouble when the person being molested chooses to ignore it. She did speak out and complained loudly and got the man kicked out of the bus and got down soon afterwards. I watched the whole thing. Got over very fast, once she started making a fuss.
I think a lot of people knew what was going on and they were waiting to see what she was going to do about it.
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment or 'eve teasing' and been supported by the public? Did they help? or show support? if yes, in what way?
I have been supported by the friends I was travelling with. I have been helped by strangers also, in very unobtrusive ways. I remember when I was nineteen and had got very wet in the rain. I needed to take the bus back home. I was wearing a very thin cotton top and had only a small bag to hold in front of me, so I tried to stay hunched but I could also see that many of the men in the bus were staring at me. The girl on my left was travelling with a young man (I think they were both in their early twenties). The guy was standing in front of her and she must have said something because he suddenly moved very slightly and I found him standing in front of me, blocking the view. He himself looked straight ahead at the horizon for the rest of the journey. Luckily, I reached my destination before they did. I've always (mentally) thanked him for his resourcefulness.
I've had people stare at me. I've had one or two unknown girls support me while a crowd looked on.
It's a horrible feeling, almost like you're being judged, because it was YOU who did something wrong.
How would you like public to react?
I would like vociferous support and I would like people to state clearly that such behaviour is not acceptable. I would like the molester to be publicly embarrassed. I don't need him to be taken to a police station -- so far I've not had to face situations that have needed such extreme measures, thank god -- but I would like him to know that women/girls travelling on their own are not helpless and unsupported.
Have you ever seen a complete stranger experience street sexual harassment?
She handled it before I could help out and didn't seem to want help. Got down from the bus soon afterwards, I think.
What made you react in the way that you did? ( Please give an account of what occurred.)
I watched and waited to see if she would speak out. Because there is no point trying to make trouble when the person being molested chooses to ignore it. She did speak out and complained loudly and got the man kicked out of the bus and got down soon afterwards. I watched the whole thing. Got over very fast, once she started making a fuss.
I think a lot of people knew what was going on and they were waiting to see what she was going to do about it.
Have you ever experienced street sexual harassment or 'eve teasing' and been supported by the public? Did they help? or show support? if yes, in what way?
I have been supported by the friends I was travelling with. I have been helped by strangers also, in very unobtrusive ways. I remember when I was nineteen and had got very wet in the rain. I needed to take the bus back home. I was wearing a very thin cotton top and had only a small bag to hold in front of me, so I tried to stay hunched but I could also see that many of the men in the bus were staring at me. The girl on my left was travelling with a young man (I think they were both in their early twenties). The guy was standing in front of her and she must have said something because he suddenly moved very slightly and I found him standing in front of me, blocking the view. He himself looked straight ahead at the horizon for the rest of the journey. Luckily, I reached my destination before they did. I've always (mentally) thanked him for his resourcefulness.
I've had people stare at me. I've had one or two unknown girls support me while a crowd looked on.
It's a horrible feeling, almost like you're being judged, because it was YOU who did something wrong.
How would you like public to react?
I would like vociferous support and I would like people to state clearly that such behaviour is not acceptable. I would like the molester to be publicly embarrassed. I don't need him to be taken to a police station -- so far I've not had to face situations that have needed such extreme measures, thank god -- but I would like him to know that women/girls travelling on their own are not helpless and unsupported.
Monday, August 25, 2008
Serena
I was in a huge, crowded bus stand, the rain and the weekend crowd creating havoc inside.
There was no sight of the bus i had to take, even hours after its intended departure time.
I had become crowd-paranoid afrer the previous incident, and I found a relatively safe niche near the exit of the bus stand where i could stand and wait for my bus.
In front of me was a continuously moving crowd, and in that, I spotted a man touching a girl.What I noticed more was that she was trying to shrug off his grip, she was clearly discomfited but unwilling to confront. The guy had thought that he would get away with it.
The next moment, a slap landed on the man’s arm. From me.
And then there were the stares. The girl’s look of thanks. The man’s chagrined stare, as he slunk away. The onlooker’s surprised stare... wondering why I would beat that guy.
And an utterly shocked, dazed stare. From me. How did I have the nerve to do this, yet again, in a place infested with men??? Did i ever think before I acted?
Another girl standing next to me asked me what had happened, but i couldn’t even bring myself to reply. I didn’t want to be noticed any more, so I slowly moved away from that place, and stood somewhere else.
Yes, just like the guy had done.
On a subconscious level i guess i am proud of what i did, and that feeling will prbly prompt me to hit again at any one who does it in front of me.
But rational thought leaves me cursing myself for my impulsiveness.
I must admit that I had subscribed to blank noise some time back.
I had unsubscribed later.
After a broken engagement, where I was blamed to be too much of a feminist for my own good.
Where I was told that I have too much temper for a girl, and all such.
This is just my two cents. I didn’t want anything to do with blank noise. I think it is pointless talking about eve teasing. Prudent girls would rather stay away from the spotlight.
And carry a safety pin in buses.
I do think that visiting this site primes me to be more antagonistic to guys, which doesn’t help.
I’d rather hone my street skills, and carry a safety pin.
And get married to a guy.
I was in a huge, crowded bus stand, the rain and the weekend crowd creating havoc inside.
There was no sight of the bus i had to take, even hours after its intended departure time.
I had become crowd-paranoid afrer the previous incident, and I found a relatively safe niche near the exit of the bus stand where i could stand and wait for my bus.
In front of me was a continuously moving crowd, and in that, I spotted a man touching a girl.What I noticed more was that she was trying to shrug off his grip, she was clearly discomfited but unwilling to confront. The guy had thought that he would get away with it.
The next moment, a slap landed on the man’s arm. From me.
And then there were the stares. The girl’s look of thanks. The man’s chagrined stare, as he slunk away. The onlooker’s surprised stare... wondering why I would beat that guy.
And an utterly shocked, dazed stare. From me. How did I have the nerve to do this, yet again, in a place infested with men??? Did i ever think before I acted?
Another girl standing next to me asked me what had happened, but i couldn’t even bring myself to reply. I didn’t want to be noticed any more, so I slowly moved away from that place, and stood somewhere else.
Yes, just like the guy had done.
On a subconscious level i guess i am proud of what i did, and that feeling will prbly prompt me to hit again at any one who does it in front of me.
But rational thought leaves me cursing myself for my impulsiveness.
I must admit that I had subscribed to blank noise some time back.
I had unsubscribed later.
After a broken engagement, where I was blamed to be too much of a feminist for my own good.
Where I was told that I have too much temper for a girl, and all such.
This is just my two cents. I didn’t want anything to do with blank noise. I think it is pointless talking about eve teasing. Prudent girls would rather stay away from the spotlight.
And carry a safety pin in buses.
I do think that visiting this site primes me to be more antagonistic to guys, which doesn’t help.
I’d rather hone my street skills, and carry a safety pin.
And get married to a guy.
Madeline Haas
I experienced street sexual harassment in Jaipur at night, but nobody else saw.
No, I did not make a scene except to complain to my family (we're Americans and were on vacation), but they were not very sympathetic.
How would you like the public to react?
Sympathy, an effort to catch and reprimand the person who harassed me.
I experienced street sexual harassment in Jaipur at night, but nobody else saw.
No, I did not make a scene except to complain to my family (we're Americans and were on vacation), but they were not very sympathetic.
How would you like the public to react?
Sympathy, an effort to catch and reprimand the person who harassed me.
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